Psalm of a Believer
By Sister Carlene Howell, OSF

Lord, how can I capture in words
the Unspoken Word
written in my very soul
since the moment you touched me
at Baptism?

I grasp at such words as “credo,” faith,” “belief”—
but find myself confined by them, not freed.
(How express experience
which has liberated me?)

Vast skies and limitless space
cannot contain the response
that aches within me. . .
the Word longing for expression–
needing to be cried out!

Lord, how do I respond to you
who are hidden in frail flesh, in doubt,
and in the silence of my soul?
How speak to the unspoken Word?
How articulate that in me
which transcends all speech?

Confined, constrained, and limited,
I attempt to respond to a God
who can be found
in the confined,
the constrained,
the limited.

Therefore, Lord, I look within myself
and find you there – – in the secrets of my heart–
in a heart confined, constrained, and limited.
And, having found you in the brokenness of my being.
I can say simply:

I believe in a God who dwells
In the insignificant,
the broken,
the wounded,
the weak,
the sinful.

I believe in a God
who walked this earth, as I do;
who knew of dreams and fear,
love and loneliness;
who experienced contradictions and support,
acceptance and rejection
who doubted, yet believed;
agonized and laughed,
wept and healed.

I believe in a God
who hated sin, yet loved the sinner;
who set himself against all systems
which trampled upon the poor and outcast
and denied them every vestige of human dignity;
who set before the law
all of life. . .
and died so all of life
might be restored forever.

I believe in a God
who sustains the bond of friendship
even when I choose to break it;
who waits for my return
when I have turned from him;
who forgives my unfaithfulness
when I come home to him.

My faith rests in a God
who took away death’s power
by rising from the dead;
who, through this incomprehensible mystery,
has declared all life to be most precious;
who, through his Resurrection,
found a way of shocking us
into taking seriously
his love for us.

My faith rests in a god
who lived and died and lives again,
and waits for me
to live, and die,
and live again,
forever- –
beyond all confinements,
constraints,
and limitations.